I'd like to start with a quote from the Dalai Lama ‘The very purpose of life is to seek happiness'. Every one reading this quote will have a different opinion of what the state of happiness actually feels like, and the best way to get there.

So who is right? It probably will not surprise you that there is more than one meaning to this word ‘happiness'. I believe there are two types of happiness. There is the ‘feel good' happiness which is demonstrated through the senses of pleasure, gladness or the attainment of what we desire. It comes from the ‘getting of something' or the ‘being with someone', it exists outside of ourselves.

Many of us are driven by the mantra of ‘MORE IS BETTER'. If we have more money, more status, more love, than we will be happy. Depending on who you are will determine how long this feeling of happiness will stay with you. For the most the attainment of ‘MORE' will provide momentary happiness, the feeling dissolving quickly, the desire for happiness remains so the quest for something new starts all over again. . Doesn't sound all that attractive does it?

The ‘other ‘happiness comes from living a rich, full and meaningful life. I am talking about the kind of life where our actions are determined by what truly matters to us. The deep values which reside within our deepest heart and which we feel truly connected. Our alignment with this value system will determine our direction. Our time, and energies will only be spent on what we consider to be valuable and worthwhile. We will not struggle with this because we have clarity about what we stand for in our life and our actions will be aligned with those beliefs. As we are living life in alignment with our personal beliefs will refuse to subjugate or apologise for our true selves and will refuse to present ourselves to the world in a way which is inauthentic. Unlike the previous sort of happiness, this type of happiness doesn't flit in and out of our lives. It is a constant, and comes with a profound appreciation for a life which is being well lived.

This full, happy life, will have its' fair share of enjoyable feelings, and moments. It also will also have challenges and the not so enjoyable feelings that come with that. As it is a balanced, full life when the emotions such as sadness, anger and fear arise they will be seen and accepted as essential elements of a full and balanced life. These emotions will not be used as an excuse to derail your happiness, they will be recognised and accepted as temporary ‘bumps in the road' and will not be resisted. Their impact and presence will therefore be temporary. Most importantly this will not derail the happiness that comes with living a balanced and full life.

‘What type of happiness have you chosen? If it is not making you happy, remember it is your fundamental right to change your mind.

Shelley Murphy is a Counsellor, Heal Your Life Workshop Leader, Angel Therapist, Reiki Master, Artist, and Writer who is passionate about personal empowerment. For more information email This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it or visit http://users.adam.com.au/buddha/healyourlife.htm